Great beats good

"If you want something you've never had, then you have to do something you've never done. You have to give up 'the good' if you want to have the great. Is it hard? Probably. Is it worth it? Definitely."

I know a girl who left a good & comfortable relationship and was in the dark for the scary unknown for a while. She then found a great relationship with a great guy. She says all the time: Great beats good anytime.

Have a GREAT holiday season!

Your life can change in a second

I know a guy who reached proper retirement age and so he officially retired. Sometime after his retirement, his daughter got into a drug addiction. His daughter has a child (his grandchild). Without hesitating, he took the child in, cared for his grandchild as if his own, and in order to financially support his grandchild, he went back to work. Just when you think you've reached a certain point in your life, you turn around and see a different one.

We shouldn't be so attached to our pictures of how life should be. It's part of life to have unexpected turns or an unexpected change.



For some amusement, here's a picture of some change heheh:

If you're having a bad day...

...there is someone else in the world that is having a worse day.

Smile. Laugh. Be thankful for what you have. Happy Thanksgiving!

Nothing is guaranteed except...

As I'm closer to my hometown, I come across people I went to high school with. It's funny how people that were much more successful than me in high school are NOT doing better than I am now and how people that had lower grades than I did in high school are doing MUCH better than I am. Nothing is ever really predictable. You could be on top, lose sight of things and lose it. Or you can be on the bottom, hang on tight and work your way up on top. Nothing is guaranteed. Nothing is permanent. Nothing is set. Nothing is for sure. The one thing you can hold on to is your power to choose right from wrong.

Despite economic hard times...

You may want to read my 5/3/09 entry; the following is a continuation of that blog.


So this person that I know who is having it rough during our tough economic times is, I officially say, a true trooper. As a reminder, she has major down time at work and earns less income, financial/professional standing is iffy, etc. However, that doesn't ruin her spirit! She is starting a small business in hopes to recover some of that loss income and since she has more time on her hands now, she is going back to school to obtain even higher education than she already possesses.

I love her attitude! In a time other people are depressed during this economic hard time, she is STILL productive and most of all, has not given up :).

I'm a witness of perseverance *****

As of this month, I have contributed one year worth of blogs. As such, I proposed one of my strongest blogs. I will leave this one up for the rest of the month:


When my grandmother passed away 2 years ago, I went to the Philippines for her funeral.

Philippine statistics: Out of 10 children, 4 will get to college, and 2 will obtain their degrees. The economy in the Philippines is in bad shape; it is TOO competitive where it is hurting the Philippine people. For example, the job market is so bad that graduates end up having cashier job positions! It makes you wonder what kind of jobs do people who are not graduates have? Exactly. I witnessed the lives which the people of the Philippines live.

I took a chair and for almost a whole day sat on a porch and watched people walk. I wanted to witness what a typical day in the streets of the Philippines looked like. I noticed a man, a disabled man who was in ripped (but relatively clean) clothing walking very irregularly as if one of his legs was longer than the other (it was later revealed to me that he had suffered a stroke; as a result, he walked in such a way). I saw him in the morning and despite his physical condition, bags of bread (called pandisal) were hanging from his arms as he was selling them. Later on that day (around the afternoon) I saw the same man - walking the same, same condition of clothing - only this time, he had bags of peanuts and again he was selling them. I now got up the nerve to buy some. I called him over and asked how much a bag was and he replied "20 pesos" which is about 40 cents in American dollars. I noted that he was also talking very irregularly - again, this was due to his stroke - it was very difficult to understand him - his words were very slurred. I gave him 100 pesos and told him to keep the change. He then looked at me like I was crazy and was motioning that he was giving the money back; he couldn't imagine that I was serious.

In a country with very poor economical standing and without disability insurance or any welfare programs, despite his financial status, physical disability, this guy is still TRYING IN LIFE.

I applaud him.

Never an easy way out, but definitely a way out

I know this great couple - I say they're great because they are honest hard-working people and provide one of the most pleasant companies. They are lucky enough to have found each other and after 10 years (yes 10 years!) of being together, they decided to tie the knot!

On their way to their honeymoon, driving to Las Vegas, to avoid a car accident since a car had cut them off, their car swerved and still led to a car accident. This car accident was no minor one - it led to several life challenges especially physical challenges.

I ponder: how you're a good & honest person right in the middle of a happy time in your life - on your way to your honeymoon to celebrate solidifying 10 years of togetherness - but yet life still has a challenge for you.

And now although the chances of a 100% recovery were slimmer than the contrary, the bride has taken off her back brace!

Bad things happen to good people and there is never an easy way out, but there is definitely a way out. It's possible! This couple is my inspiration to getting through tough times.

Today is their one year wedding anniversary! Getting through tough times together is what successful marriages are all about! Happy one year!

Atypical marriage

When I witnessed this particular couple getting married, I thought: It's very rare that two people are getting married while the two people are BOTH marrying up. I wasn't wrong:

Husband misplaces his wedding ring. Wife says, "That's okay. We'll just get you a new one." Husband says, "But I want to be a husband who doesn't lose his wedding ring."

How about that? A wife that is cool/understanding about her husband misplacing his wedding ring and a husband that is hard on himself for misplacing it. True story. I wish most marriages were like this.

Congratulations to you both; you know who you are.

Some bad things aren't 100% bad

I know a girl who was in long & stable relationship. They loved each other & laughed together - it was a good relationship. While they were still in their 20's, they were still in the phase of building a life for themselves and so he had to do what he had to do on one side of the globe and so did she on the other side of globe. Although long-distance relationships are extremely difficult, they figured that all the sacrifices are definitely worth it for each other - as long as they ultimately end up together with good standing lives, that's all that mattered to them. However, during the months they were apart, the guy ended up cheating on her. She was devastated...so devastated that she lost 20 pounds in a month! She said that what troubled her was: She was willing to bet her life that he was a good guy who unconditionally loved her and that he was the one. Her faith and her trust in her perception of how good people are were shaken. She thought if a good relationship couldn't work, then nothing will work. She continued this way for about a year.

She tried dating and as much as she dated good guys - guys that had their lives together, long-term relationship guys, good careers, good character, she still felt the same - very little faith in relationships and very little trust in herself that she can make it work.

And just when she was about to give up...just when she was about to toss her last ounce of faith in relationships, she met a new guy that she had no intention of dating...little by little she began to see that he wasn't a good guy - he was great guy! She said that there was something about him that makes him great! She said there were many great things she was unaware about that her previous relationship lacked that she wouldn't have ever known. They eventually got together and have been together for a few years now and are going strong.

Imagine, if the first guy never cheated on her, she wouldn't have ever gotten out of that one and would have settled for good and would have never experienced great. Sometimes bad things happen for a reason; sometimes bad things aren't 100% bad as her bad thing led to something GREAT.
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Happy 4th of July everyone!

There is good even after a series of bad

I was sitting and waiting at the airport, waiting to board. I sat next to a lady in her 60's. We got to talking - what's your name, what do you do, etc. I found out that on her spare time, she does what she calls "chant". She explained that sometime during her lifetime, she divorced her husband because he was an alchoholic who hit her and after her divorce, she was diagnosed with depression - she explained that she was angry and miserable. She then found "chanting" and through this and of course after some time, she found a perspective in life - a positive perspective that life does not have to miserable - the good in life can co-exist with the bad. After being enlightened with this new positive perspective in life, she threw out the miserable person and came the happy cheery person I saw before me.

Another example that there is good even after a series of bad experiences in life.

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Today is the first day of Summer 2009! Sunny bright days ahead of us! Yay!

180 degrees

I have a pretty good friend. I met her when she was already a graduate. But before that, when she was in high school, she had really bad grades and got into trouble a lot in school. Sometime after high school somewhere somehow she changed her ways - she attended a community college, transferred to a 4-year university and eventually obtained her bachelors degree. She mentioned to me that all her friends from high school are doing exactly the same thing - they are ruining their lives by running up their criminal records while some are even taking drugs to the point where their physical health is at stake. [She says that she tries to get them out - but as much as she tries to help, she says that she can only help to a certain point and the rest is up to the individual.] I asked her how she got out of that lifestyle and she said: choices.

You don't have to get sucked in; you can choose.

Two conflicting items in one

I used to work with a particular reviewer. He was known to be extremely critical over a staff member's work - he really tells you everything that you do wrong and where you can improve. With all this, he was very likeable - he was everyone's favorite! He was a constructive critic and delivered in the best way! He is well-intentioned and had growth in mind. Who said you couldn't be critical and likeable in the same time? He has the perfect balance. Pure talent.

It's been years since I worked with him and until today, I carry valuable tools I got from him. In fact, a lot of my professional strengths today stem from him.

I highly respect him.

Once discontent, now appreciative

I know someone who was not content with how things were in her life. There was nothing horrible, but she wanted a lot of improvements. Although she complained a lot about her dissatisfaction, she was working hard toward getting the things she wanted - she was at least doing something about it. However, one day, she got hit with consecutive problems. As much as she is trying to survive these consecutive problems now, she wishes that she was more appreciative of the previous time in her life when life just needed some improvements.

Always cherish your moments, no matter how bad they seem to be.

My Hero: My Grandmother, Lola Ala*****

Lola Ala, my paternal grandmother, is my ETERNAL HERO. She endured being WIDOWED TWICE, being BLIND in one eye, and HARD LABOR throughout her whole life. She started off as a coconut FARMER then over the years moved to managing the plantation/business, and then by the time of her death she owned 32 ACRES of land. Her life was tough for her (being educated as far as 4th grade) yet she raised 4 GREAT and also successful children - she put all her children through school as a SINGLE MOTHER. She raised good children - my dad is one of the most genuine people I know and her children (my uncles and aunt) are my second parents. In a country with very poor economy, she was able to fund her OWN RETIREMENT without aid from anyone - not her children - not from the government - all from herself. And most of all, she is widely known as a HELPFUL and GOOD PERSON.

I wish I counted how many people went to her viewing/funeral; it was just too crowded.

Happy birthday my Lola! Hope you're resting in peace.

Same situation, different reaction

I know someone pretty close to me. I saw her last weekend and was just asking about how life has been lately and she mentioned that due to how bad her company/employer is doing in this harsh economy, she got a 20% pay cut, no longer works full-time hours and just last week, they had a company-wide shut down; thus, she had to take unpaid time off for a week! However, what struck me was not how "scary" her professional/financial situation was, but it was how she delivered her message - she said it without intent - it was simply informative - meaning she wasn't trying to be upbeat about it which would have been untruthful, but she also was not looking for sympathy (like a drama queen). She was just plain honest...which now that I think about it, is something I have always admired about her.

She is a wonder because even though she goes through the same hardships as most people do, she is the opposite of a drama queen without being overly/annoyingly positive. I just found it admirable that although her situation is of a concern during our hard economic times just like everyone else, she is keeping her cool and is handling it with a strong yet honest attitude.

10% is what happens to you; 90% is your reaction.

Old is relative and so is hard times

I met a 60 year-old lady at the airport and she and I got to talking and sharing little bits about each other. She was a hip lady - she was wearing boots with at least 2-3 inch heels, skinny jeans, was showing her bra with cleavage, and her hair was spikey. She was flying to San Diego where her son, his wife and kids live and she said that she can't stand the weather down there - she said that she doesn't like warm weather - she prefers the cool weather in the Bay Area. I always thought that San Diego weather was perfect and so I asked how she felt about Las Vegas weather. She had a real disgusted expression on her face and said "the last time I was there was 1968. I remember I was in my mid twenty's and didn't know a thing about the world. I can't believe how naive I used to be." Mind you that I did not reveal my age to her, but it's just funny that she specifically said her mid-twenties.

I was thinking "I'm in my mid-twenties?!" - someone can still look at me as a young & naive person - I'm starting to think a lot of things are relative - that there's always going to be someone who is older than you, less wealthier than you, has a harder life than you do - so really should just enjoy what we have =)

The sky REALLY is the limit

I think we can all agree that engineering is one of the most challenging majors. I know A LOT of smart guys that took 6 or 7 years to obtain their engineering degrees or gave up on engineering entirely - and these guys were exceptionally smart - they received high honors during high school graduation, got into good schools etc - but engineering is THAT difficult.

My cousin Jay however took about 4 years to graduate - and not only that - he did this while having 3 part-time jobs; he was helping with my dad's drafting business, he was a teller at Wells Fargo bank and he also had his engineering internship. Not only that but he had time for his friends which he remains great friends with till this day (he's now in his late 20's) AND he had his long-time relationship to keep up with.

Today: He continues to be successful. He has his coupe BMW, his new and awesome house in the suburbs and his boat which is his toy for water sports. Now, he is about to make his life even more complete by marrying his very long-time girlfriend who stood by him since he was at stage 1. The sky is his limit.

Conclusion: It's up to you how much you want to get out of life. Such accomplishments are obviously possible!

She was afraid of being alone

I know a girl who was afraid of being alone. She was afraid of not having a man in her life. She was in a long-term relationship - I forgot exactly how long they were together, but it's somewhere between 4 to 6 years. Although their relationship was long, it was not healthy - he was a bad guy. He couldn't keep a stable job, had bad credit, took drugs and cheated on her numerous times and because of her fear of being alone, she always forgave him (and he probably knew too that she would always forgive him). Although he was not good to her, she was set with him. At a young age, she married him and got pregnant to seal the deal that she would always have a man in her life. She may have been hoping that he would change after marriage and fatherhood, but nothing changed. Because of her new son, she got fed up with him not trying to be a good father and so she filed for divorce (in her early 20's).

Now, life is much tougher for her. Instead of being a single girl in her 20's (which is what a lot of girls I know are dreading), she's now a single-mother with a drug-user unemployed ex-husband in her 20's. After giving birth to her son, she did out grow her fear of being without a man. She is very much surviving single parenthood! =) For her son, she's a much stronger person now.

I know a lot of girls who are afraid of going through life without a man, but having no man is much better than having a bad man. True story.

If you need a little inspiration...

Another Sunday of reflection to start off the week!

If you need a little inspiration, watch the movie "Pursuit of Happyness" with Will Smith. It's a true story of true hardship and true perseverance.

People can change for the better...REALLY

I knew this girl prior to my moving to southern California in 2001. I didn't get to keep in touch with her in the last 7-8 years. She was raised with one of the most spoilage you could imagine. Her spoilage led to many problems - lack of ambition (since she always relied on her parents), losing friends (because of bad/spoiled attitude), and the list goes on and on.

Now that I'm back in the Bay Area, I've reconnected with her. She's now in her late 20's and I see a girl transformed! She's now helpful, courteous, and overall just mature - a complete one eighty.

Conclusion: We can change ourselves at anytime at any age. There is never no hope in people.

A note for those trying to lose weight

I put on a lot of weight since hmm 2006? I blame it on:

1) I had just started a new relationship in late 2005 so I blame the relationship fat.

Also 2) since I never had the freshman 15, the "slowage" of metabolism caught up with me at the age of 22.

And 3) working - instead of running up and down the hills of San Diego State with 4 inch accounting books on my back, I started working behind a desk with VERY MINIMAL movement.

So I have a cousin who is 10 years older (she's now 35) who managed to lose her weight. She is looking her best! She even looks better than when she was 28 or 25 or 21 or 16 - seriously! And all the excuses I have above are pretty much inexcusable as 1) she's married so relationship fat is no excuse 2) she is 10 years older so I can't blame the metabolism "slowage" 3) like me, she works behind a desk and most of all she has a # 4) she's had THREE kids! And she STILL managed to lose her weight.

Conclusion: Throw away your excuses! Lose your weight for the new year!

It's never too late (you're never too old)

I know a 61 year old man who recently migrated to the United States (from another country) and he's just now learning new ways of life - new language, new culture, new geography, new everything!

During my last visit in the Philippines in Aug/Sept 2007, I met an 87 year old woman. She was speaking to me in English; she was proficient; speaking English appeared natural to her. Then I found out that she learned English in her 80's. I would have never guessed! I would have guessed that she learned during young adulthood. I also found out that she just learned how to text at the age of 83.

You can learn anything at any age! The issue won't be when you did it, but whether you did it at all. If there's anything you always wanted to do and always thought it was too late, DO IT IN 2009! Happy New Year!

"It's never too late to become what you might have been." ~John Pasco